Tuesday, May 15, 2007

Can't think of a post title today - my brain is mushy from the heat outside and the lack of sleep from a fussy baby last night.

Well, I'm still not moving forward on the weight loss front, though my attitude is still positive. My problem is the emotional eating, and I'm having trouble stopping. Over the past few months, I've undertaken several attempts to get back into shape - meal planning, stroller walking, personal training, etc. These are all positive things, and I'm glad that I've done them.

For some reason though, I'm finding the weight loss mountain a bit high to climb right now, and I'm still striving for "the perfect day". You know, where I follow the eating plan, get in my workout, be an awesome mom, an attentive wife, and even find time for myself? Every single day? Over and over again? And when one of these things fails to happen, I surrender myself.

Well, I'm starting to step back and realize that having a day like that is almost NEVER going to happen. And if that's what I'm waiting for in order to lose this weight, well, I'm always going to be overweight.

I guess part of my struggle is being a "perfectionist" in my other life, and holding myself to the same standards. I'm starting to realize that's not going to happen.

So, it's going to be incredibly hard and slow, but I've got to start cutting myself some slack. I'm going to commit to one thing each week. One thing only. If everything else goes out the window, that's okay - because I'll be better off than I was the previous week, right? And then I'm going to stick to that ONE thing all week. And build from there. It feels a lot more doable right now, and I'll actually feel like I'm moving forward if I can achieve this.

I'm starting with exercise, because I'm finding the eating to be so challenging right now. Hopefully the eating will start to follow.

My commitment for the rest of the week: Exercise 4 times. Either at the gym, going for a long walk, swim, etc. Nothing else.

I've already walked 5K today, so I'm already progressing!

((Funny - I just added a bunch of things to my commitment for the week before deleting them - water intake, weight training sessions, etc. Ha ha - it's VERY hard not to reach for the stars right now...but soon, I will)).


PearShapedGirl said...

**Well, I'm starting to step back and realize that having a day like that is almost NEVER going to happen. And if that's what I'm waiting for in order to lose this weight, well, I'm always going to be overweight.**

Wow, you hit the nail on the head with that one!! I'm the same way, totally perfectionist, black and white, no middle ground. If I'm not eating and exercising perfectly, then I'm bingeing and lying on the couch. It's all about finding a balance... to me that's the hard part. Good luck!

Take care,

Cowgirl Warrior said...

I so feel the same way, being a bit of a perfectionist myself. I think you've hit the nail on the head. My focus last week was to do yoga every day and I did it. Which made me realize that would probably work for things like water.

To get from one place to another only takes one step at a time.

Kim said...

Ah, the lure of the perfect day!! Don't torture yourself waiting for that to happen. I agree that you need to give yourself some more slack, and concentrate on the little things that you can control. Start with the exercise. Add in a glass of water before and after every meal. Add a fruit to every meal, and then a veggie. Over time you are going to see results and that is what it is all about. You will also be setting your baby girl up for a wonderful foundation for a healthy lifestyle, and the gift of knowing that she doesn't have to be "perfect" to turn her goals into realities!!! You can do this Sonya!! Baby steps!!! :)

jodi said...

i love/hate being a perfectionist and it sounds like, so do many others... you DO have to cut yourself a break because you're only person and there's only 24 hours in the day... i think you have a great plan though - pick one thing and start with that cus you can always add to it later... :o)

Anandi said...

We are exactly the same wrt perfectionism! Congrats on figuring out that baby steps will still get you to your goal. I'm trying to work on the same thing myself - easy to say, but harder to put into practice.

noelle said...

Good for you, mama, for coming to that realization. You can only do so much and be so many people in one day. There will be days like today where you haven't gotten enough sleep. Do your best and keep moving down the path.

You will do it...but it will take time. You will get some semblance of your previous self back...but with the huge bonus of a little girl who thinks you are the most amazing person she has ever met.

Get that exercise. Four times a week is my goal, too. I've had 2 great sessions this week. And I've got till Saturday to get the other 2 in. I can do it...and so can you, girl!

jeannie* said...

Wonderful post!!! It is so tempting to just keep reaching for that perfect day... and then keep beating ourselves up because we never have it.

I think your plan is great! Work on one thing... get into the routine of working out this week, and then next week if you focus on something else youll already be used to working out!

Brilliance! Good luck :)

Teresa said...

How true about waiting for the perfect day. (Me too) Pretty high standards, we set for ourselves. But the truth be told I've never met any one who was perfect.

Yes it is time to cut yourself some slack. One day at a time, bit by bit and you will get there. You can do it.

Christy said...

I think being a perfectionist is what kills us. If I don't feel like I'm having a perfect day, I totall;y self sabotage myself. I think you have a wonderful attitude, just trying to meet one goal a week. You can't take it all on yourself. I've been thinking alot lately and I'm going to try focussing on being healthy. I have to get rid of my scale obsession, and I think if you do one thing healthy a day, you are in a better position then if you hadn't done it. I think you're on the right track. If you don't mind, I'm going to ride right beside you

CaRoLyN said...

You're doing the right thing in my mind. Setting small goals at a time. Wait until you feel like you've mastered those and then take on another thing. Taking on Motherhood, exercise, eating healthy alone can be overwhelming. Just take baby steps. The most important thing though is believing you can do it. Really believing. Know that you can do these things. You have it in you and you ARE strong enough!