Monday, December 14, 2009

Everyone has their vices

My vice is food.

Duh, right? It's true. Different people struggle with different things in their lives, but I just can't seem to get down to business and lose weight. I mean, it's not hard at all for some people: get moving, eat less, and bing-bang-boom! The weight comes off. That's all it boils down to. But for those of us who struggle with this, it's so much more than that. Food overpowers us every single day. Decisions on what to eat, how much to eat, and what to avoid are overwhelming. And the guilt factor....oh, let's not even go there.

I take two steps forward and one step back. Which, if you do the math, is still a net movement forward. That's still progress, I suppose. But I need to stop taking the step backward, and perhaps I'll get to where I need to be that much sooner! It's frustrating.

My problem is, I've been all cavalier about the holidays. Thought I could resist every temptation put in front of me, because I'm so much better than food. Thought I could start off my birthday celebrations this month with one measly bite of cake. Thought I could tsk-tsk other people at holiday parties while they stuffed their faces with sweets. Thought I could avoid licking the baking spoon, laden with delicious batter. Whatever! I have failed miserably.

The redeeming thing about all of this, is that I am nowhere close to my bad habits of last year. It just feels like I'm rowing the boat in the wrong direction right now.

So, before I get sucked any deeper into this ridiculous holiday quicksand, I am turning this ship around immediately. The scale was not kind to me this morning. So, I'll respect its honesty (because it's down to my own actions after all), and will try to please it by the end of the week.

It'll be an uphill battle, folks: we're in the crux of holiday season. But if you want something badly enough, you'll find a way to do it. Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm off to make an appointment to spin some calories off tonight.


nic said...

You contradicted yourself. You can't fail miserably if you've made improvements over last year.

Weight loss is NOT a quick fix, it's dealing with the issues we have with food that is SO much more important than speed.

Trust me, I've been at this for years and years and I'm still not at goal, but I'm a billion times healthier and I make WAY better choices.

That is a VICTORY not a failure. If you look at it positively, you'll have far better results, my love.

You're doing AWESOME.

Teresa said...

One day at a time, you're doing so much right and moving a the right direction. Keep it up. Holidays are a killer!

Rebecca said...

oh Sonja... I wish I had some words of wisdom.

Like the others said though, any improvement from last year is great!

I know you want to lose this weight, and we do all have issues, but try to be a tad kinder to yourself, your not doing as horribly as you think you are!


Sheridan said...

oh yes we all do have our vices some of us more than one but you know what after that whole paragraph of food related holiday yikes you redeemed yourself right at the're going spinning. Now tell me, did you think about that last year when licking the batter of the spoon? So every year gets a little better and yes it might take a little longer to shed the extra weight, but I'd like to think it stays off better too that way! So don't beat yourself up, you're doing fine! :)

All Women Stalker said...

Please don't focus too much on your failures. I like what Rihanna's new tattoo says: Never a failure, always a lesson. It's so much better to take failure in that light. When you learn, you succeed.

Take care!


janet said...

You have learned so much in the last year, and you ran a 5k, look at all your progress! You didn't put the weight on overnight and you can't take it off overnight either. But you are closer to your goal, and you are doing great!

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